Yes, that’s right, that does appear to be Winnie the Pooh on the left there, and no, I did not have the time or drive or whatever to ask ChatGPT to take it out, and yes, I do like including shitty AI images whenever I can to remind ourselves that we, the humans, are so much better than these robots! So much better! Look at this shite!
Welcome to the Minnows preseason rankings for League Two, 2025! What a time to be alive!
For the purpose of understanding the narrative drivers of the existential dramas that define this fantastic league, we’ve drawn up some categories to break down our teams for this season.
- Box Office Minnows
- Model Citizens
- Punching Up
- Various Stages of a Hangover
- Full Blown Identity Crisis
- Apocalypse Now
We’re going to go through the teams in each of these categories, then predict where each team is going to finish this season. If you want that spoiler, just jump to the end to find our predicted table.
Let’s jump in!
Box Office Minnows
The clubs that have the light shining brightest on them – not necessarily the best clubs, just the ones that are taking the spotlight and have high stakes attached to their names.
MK Dons
The villains of League Two. People were pissed when these guys fucked over AFC Wimbledon, and they’re still pissed today, and people love to BE pissed about this team. It’s something we love to do, as an animal, is relish in the decline and fall of those who deserve it. HUBERIS: Herodotus, Histories, pride comes, English Patient, great movie, look it up.
This is a team that polarizes – that is brash, that splashes around, and that wants you to know about it. And for me, I polarize to the “wanker” side of the debate. I can’t stand this fucking club. They feel like pretenders, all hat no cattle.
But if I check my underdog privilege at the fucking DOOR, then I’ll see that without this club, League Two, the EFL, the entire football and community infrastructure that is modern football, is worse off. Because we all need a villain. And that’s who these guys are.
They had an absolute shitshow of a season last year, they were expected to win it all and they finished 19th. They cleaned house and have Paul Warne at the helm because they want to be a serious club, and they need a serious manager. Serious face all round. Warne is a “promotion guy”.
They’re currently the short-priced favorite to win the league, basically half the odds of the next highest ranked club (3-1 vs Chesterfield, 7-1). Which feels idiotic, frankly, to go from 19th to winning the league. They’ve brought in some guys like striker Aaron Collins from Bolton, Nathaniel Mendez-Laing from Derby. But the bet here is that Warne can get everyone gelling and moving in the same direction, and that last season was just an aberration.
They’re a shitshow masquerading as a grown-up, their kits are boring as fuck, they have no soul, they’re essential villains of the league. I have them finishing mid-table, in 10th. A bounce-back of sorts compared to the previous year, but not the league-topping performance that bookmakers are predicting.
Salford City
The whole vibe of this club is whack to me, as a lover of the underdog: both out of sync with the mission of this project, yet also totally in sync with our worldview. Project 92 Limited. Sounds like a clean water non-profit.
In 2014, at the time the Man Utd players Nicky Butt, Ryan Giggs, Gary and Phil Neville, and Paul Scholes took over the club, Giggs announced that their goal was Championship level football within 15 years. “We need to get into the football league,” Nicky Butt said. “Once we are there, we can reach for the stars.”
Well…well, there are five years left, Nicky. Time to get a fucking wriggle on. They’ve made huge strides, sure, but they’ve also kind of stagnated here in League Two. There’s a ton of star power, there’s a clear vision, and there’s still a lot of work to do.
Let’s not forget what these guys, Project 92, did when they took over. They burned the place to the fucking ground. A charming burn down, but they changed the club colors, the stadium, the vibe. And this was intentional – at the time, Scholes said there wasn’t “much you could do with a League One or League Two club”, aka you were stuck in the trap and cycle of mediocrity and you couldn’t get out. Here you could, you know, do things your way.
And of course it was NIETZSCHE, of all people, who said that, I think, that we’ve gotta burn it all down in order to start fresh. “One must still have chaos in oneself to be able to give birth to a dancing star.” Give Nicky Butt and Paul Scholes their dancing star, bro!
Look, this is ultimately a massively successful story by any measure, moving a club up from nothing to something, from NWCFL Division One in 2007 to League Two in 2019 (and winning the EFL Trophy in that same year). And the owners clearly care: Gary Neville fronted a Fan Forum in May to take questions from supporters, and is there a busier guy out there than Gary? Wouldn’t you rather these guys run your club rebirth project than a hedge-funder who’s yet to undergo ego death?
So what now? What next? Can they deliver on the promise of Butt, EPL by 2030? Or is more League Two seasoning needed? What will uncork the next level?
They built a bunch of momentum last year, cruising along in third in January but then sliding and finishing 8th, just outside the playoffs. Made a great FA Cup run that ended in them being crushed by Man City, ironically, poetically. So there’s momentum here, potentially a sense of greatness. I’m talking myself into it, I’m talking myself into the story, and that’s why I’m seeing a promo push from these guys up into the top of the table, and a fourth place finish.
Model Citizens
Let’s switch categories now and take a look at the Model Citizens out there, clubs that kind of have it all figure out (for now, at least). I’m going to dance a little quicker through some of these because there’s just a little less to say, they’re generally quite nicely run.
Barrow AFC
So the narrative here is supposed to be a team on a kind of steady incline, and that’s basically been Barrow since 2007. (And, we should be clear to note, that prior to 2007 there was a dark, dark period in Barrow’s history, including defender James Cotterill being jailed, and I think he’s the first person to do this, but being jailed for assaulting Bristol Rovers striker Sean Rigg. So dark days.)
But the dark days are over, as Florence would say! They had a steady rise out of non-league football, got out of the Football Conference in 2020, and have stayed up in League Two since.
Their identity is built around the four S’s of Barrow-in-Furness: Steel, Smelting, Shipyards, and Submarines. Can you think of a stronger foundation? I’ve been in plenty of brand workshops and none can hold a candle to the foundation bedrock of the four S’s. Get the fuck out there and play for the fucking SMELTED STEEL SUBMARINES THEY’RE BUILDING IN THE FUCKING SHIPYARDS, YA FOOKS.
They finished 16th last season, solidly up. They’ve made a bunch of transfers this offseason to try to reinforce the spine, from keeper all the way through the midfield and up-front. They’re keeping Andy Whing, trying to execute on his vision. I see it. I see it Andy Whing, I see it Barrow-in-Furness, submarine football forever. A 14th placed finish for Barrow this season.
Colchester United
So Danny Cowley is the guy who took Lincoln City on their epic FA Cup run in 2016-2017. They got to the quarter finals and upset Ipswich Town, Brighton and Burnley along the way.
I was reading up about Danny Cowley, and it made me think, am I focused on the wrong leagues with this project? “Underdog” teams? What about Concord Rangers? Braintree Town? Also, how do these managers ever choose where to buy a house, or even rent with any certainty? As a player and coach, Danny Cowley has been at the following clubs: Barking, Romford, AFC Hornchurch, Brentwood Town, Concord Rangers, Braintree Town, Lincoln City, Huddersfield Town, Portsmouth, and now Colchester United.
Cowley has a reputation as a calm, steadying influence on a team: and don’t just take my word for it, go and watch highlights of that Lincoln City FA Cup run and see his face at the end of each game, he looks like he’s introducing himself to another parent at a five year old’s birthday party. (The key to surviving conversations at children’s birthday parties, by the way, taught to me by my mate Terry: the FORD method. F = Family – which of these rugrats are yours? O = Occupation – what do you do for a crust? R = Recreation – what do you do in your spare time? And D = Deep – pick the most interesting response and go deep, baby, go deep.)
He looks a bit older now, Cowley, than 8 years ago, and taking on these shitshow clubs as he has will do that to a man’s face. And he may have been aging even faster these last few months as the club has been in constant rumors about a potential sale to a US consortium. The move just fell through, but still created lots of roster and staffing limbo as Colchester looks to build momentum off their positive finish last year. Delightful for all involved. They finished mid-table (10th) after finishing close to the bottom of League Two the previous four seasons.
You know, this is another situation where fresh ownership, especially in the form of a US-backed consortium, offers both opportunity and uncertainty. While cases like the one currently against 777Partners appear to be more like straightforward fraud, there’s also a question of investment thesis for some of these consortium and private equity partners: are they looking at these clubs as true investments that will pay a return over time? Will they look to drive economies of scale?
I am a fan of Cowley, he knows how to build programs, and I think there’s momentum building here. Bookmakers have Colchester with the 11th-best odds to win the league, and I’ve got them right there as well: 11th for Colchester in League One this year.
Crewe Alexandra
Crewe is a well-run, solid outfit with the hopes of remaining just that, and the potential to do, perhaps, just a little bit more. The core of their approach is their academy – “a football academy that happens to run a first team,” as I saw it described. Low drama, high integrity. Lee Bell has been manager since November 2022, a long tenure by most measures, and is well regarded as a thoughtful manager.
You know, much like Barrow earlier, with the smelting submarines, Crewe’s connection to their Railwaymen moniker is more than just iconic. The club was founded by workers at the London and North Western Railway works in Crewe, which was one of the world’s largest and most important rail depots in the world at the time (around 1877). The club emerged as the recreational outlet for the industrial workforce who built, repaired, and lived by the rhythm of the trains. And this work, this precise, patient, prideful work – not flashy, but diligent, and methodical – drives the blueprint for the club and how they approach their football. It’s craft over chaos, diligence over drama.
And while those halcyon days are gone, Crewe remains a hub for rail operations and maintenance and as a critical node for transportation.
So, even a seventh grader could pull together this symbolism to come up with something reasonably clever, but there’s an iconography here that runs through the club, through the academy, through the spirit of the whole operation.
They had a reasonable finish last season, 13th, and they tailed off after being close to the playoffs up until January. In the offseason, they’ve been reasonably quiet. They will no doubt focus on continuing their quiet drive to stay up.
The bookmakers have them with the 17th best odds to win the league, I’ve got them right around the same spot finishing 15th in the league this season.
Grimsby Town
The term “Grimsby” comes from the Danish “grim,” which means “mask” or “masked one.” And if you really want to go down a rabbit hole, go and start to research the myth of Havelok the Dane, and the founding of Grimsby, and early influences from the Normans and the Danish on early England, and the “Grim-stone.” Anyway this is a football project, not early European mythology, but it’s interesting stuff, and the first thing that stood out to me about Grimsby is that word “grim” of course, it’s a loaded word, especially when it comes to represent a fishing town, a port town in Lincolnshire, at the mouth of the Humber River, with a deep history of the Cod Wars and the fishing industry and the post-industrial decline that hit so many towns in the UK.
I love the vibe of this team, their crest, their kits (although I would love them to revert to the chocolate brown one of old). They’ve played across the top 5 tiers in English football since their founding in 1889 (they haven’t reached the top flight since just after WWII).
There’s some hope for this season based on the success of last year. They finished just out of the playoffs in 9th. They are well owned and managed by seemingly pragmatic, practical ownership (1878 Partners) alongside the Mariners Trust, chaired by a local entrepreneur and lifelong fan. They’ve been active in the offseason, bringing in a number of fresh faces like Jamie Walker from Bradford City and Zac Gilsenan. And they’re helmed by David Artell, a fiery guy, focused on team chemistry, who has been there since November of ‘23.
They finished 9th last year, and call me a sucker for a story, but I think they continue to push up this year and are right in the thick of the playoff picture. I have them finishing the year in 9th and making a real run at it. Bookmakers have them a little lower around 13th, but there’s something here. Up the Mariners.
Harrogate Town
What’s a fancier creature than a cockroach that, like a cockroach, would also be able to survive a nuclear holocaust? What’s the middle to upper class version of a cockroach?
I think you get what I’m ham-fisting here which is, these guys should not survive, but like the cockroach, they find a way. But they also are a strange underdog prospect, because they come from a pretty salubrious part of England, the opposite of your Grimsbys and Barrows. They have this affluent background and culture, mixed with the ultimate underdog of being the smallest club in English professional football.
Some highlights about this story, for me:
- The manager, Simon Weaver, is the longest-serving manager in the EFL
- His boss, the owner of the club, is his dad, Irving Weaver
- The facilities are boutique (eg. anti-mud hybrid grass pitches, I say), but the way of playing is gritty, direct, winning through effort, not beauty.
- If you think I’m blowing smoke, go and watch the Day in the Life YouTube video with Simon Weaver, it is eye opening and shows the grittiness and tenacity of the approach at Harrogate.
The whole thing feels very village, relatable, community based, but also kind of on a knife’s edge, on a precipice. Are these new fans who came in with the club was promoted in 2020 going to stick with them through thick and thin?
The club approach is that you can survive in the upper tiers without a lot of drama, that you can make it. And that would probably continue to be a great ambition and goal of this club, to stay in the league.
Bookies don’t like them, they have them with the second worst odds, write your own ticket odds to win the league. I just don’t know how you can bet against the infrastructure and proven heritage to stay up, though, so I’ve got them outside the relegation zone in 19th this season.
Punching Up
Bromley
Bromley had an awesome season last year after their first season, ever, in their 125+ year history, in league football. Led admirably by the charismatic everyman Andy Woodman, with his focus on winning football over flashy aesthetics – “500 passes don’t earn an extra point,” right on Andy – this has the feel of a club on the rise. They finished in 11th place last year in a season where just staying up, anywhere, would have felt like a win.
They’re chaired and owned by Robin Stanton-Gleaves, a hyper-pragmatist whose approach to the game is basically, walk before you run. You go up when you’re ready to go up. Patient and methodical with his approach to stewardship, probably exactly what you want in an owner if you’re a fan.
Of course, the beauty of this league is it could all come crashing down in an instant. All the thoughtful, grown-up ownership and managerial approach in the world mean nothing if you can’t stop goals at one end and put them in the net at the other. They’ve loaded up on some additional depth, especially at the back with the addition of Kyle Cameron from Notts County and Taylor Foran from Arsenal’s youth team. They lost winger Harry McKirdy to Crawley and brought in Mitch Pinnock from Northampton to replace some of his energy.
These things usually go one of two directions: up, or down. You look at the recent records of Bromley, and it is hard to not see a trend: Third round of the FA Cup last season; Group Stage of the EFL Trophy last season: winners of the FA Trophy in 21-22. Can they keep building on this momentum and go even higher this year?
Bookmakers say no: they have Bromley close to the bottom, 18th best odds. I have the opposite thought and say that Andy Woodman and co keep the foot on the gas and keep pushing this year, and finish the season in 7th place and a shot at promotion.
Chesterfield
Another well-run club with strong local ownership, collaborative, fan-informed ownership and a long-term manager at the helm, Paul Cook (since 2022). Are we seeing a trend here yet? These well-run clubs try not to cut and run on managers every three or four months! Amazing insight.
Cook is in his second stint at Chesterfield: he led the team to win League Two in 2014, and then to a sixth place finish in League One the following year. He then made a journey around the league at various promoted and relegated clubs, being generally successful, until he returned to Chesterfield in 2022 after they had been relegated to the National League. He got them out in 2024, and they finished in 7th place last season.
They have added inspiration this year, with well-liked co-owner Phil Kirk sadly diagnosed with inoperable cancer a few months ago. They’ve plugged a hole at goalkeeper with Zach hemming from Middlesbrough, added Lee Bonis up front to go alongside Will Grigg, and have generally shored up their spine and some of their depth.
Bookmakers like them to go up this year – second favorites behind MK Dons at 7/1 – and I like them, too. I have them finishing second, and securing automatic promotion to League One, continuing the great story and great momentum they’ve had over the past few years.
Barnet FC
First of all, I just need to get this off my chest. As an Australian, it infuriates me that these guys sacked Harry Kewell in 2021 after just seven games in charge. Anytime an Aussie top-knot legend is not given at least a chance to succeed is frustrating, I mean seven games, come on, what could you have known after seven games?!
However, if you look at the managerial career of one H. Kewell, there are some troubling trends…
- Crawley Town: 15 months
- Notts County: 10 weeks
- Oldham Athletic: Eight months
- Barnet: Four months (but also just seven games)
- Celtic (as an assistant): One year under the warm embrace of Big Ange
- Yokohama: Seven months
He most recently was on the list of 170 names applying for coach of the India national team. The India national team went in a different direction.
But back to Barnet! Beautiful name, what’s in a name, beautiful name, Barnet. If I was having a third child, I would add it to the roster, but that is completely off the cards.
Let’s dive in to the Hive mentality – is the Hive buzzing?! The Hive IS buzzing. Let’s start with Queen Bee Dean Brennan, fired up Irish manager who called Barnet fans “moany” and “miserable” after they quit on the team last year. “Don’t edit that out!” he warned the club publicity officer. Way to go Dean! Shit on those Bees fans!
Bookies really like them: they have the 10th best odds of winning the league. But these guys have been in and out of League Two for the past thirty years. They’re newly promoted this season, and for some clubs, that means step one of twenty, keep building on the momentum, keep pushing for back to back promos. I fear it means the opposite for Barnet, where the mentality is really, let’s stay up, stay up at all costs. Siege mentality, all fall in behind the Dubliner, let’s hammer this out.
I think they stay up, but just. 22nd place.
Oldham Athletic
Another club in this section that fired Harry Kewell. And, like Barnet, were promoted last season, so they’ve got to be in this section, they’re on the up.
Led by the one and only Micky Fuckin Mellon, the journeyman Scottsman, perennial promotion-getter. Career win rate of 45%, he brings fire and passion to the sideline and that just get it done willingness and gumption, making his players believe. He took Fleetwood Town to two promotions over a decade ago, got Shrewsbury promoted, back-to-back promos with Tranmere Rovers, I mean this is the quintessential EFL manager and its great to have him back in the top four tiers.
The Latics are kind of coalescing around this idea of being a community club, much like a lot of the clubs earlier in this preview, the model citizens of the league. It’s all very new though, they have a history of being a bit of a shitshow, so fans will be hoping this sticks and that supporters continue to be a part of decision making.
The 3-2 win over Southend at Wembly was epic, extra time, the kind of stuff dreams are made of. And so the question here is, do they build on that energy? Or do they endure a post-ecstasy hangover, start slow, feel overwhelmed, start to question their decisions of the night before, and before you know enter the new year with single digit points, out of all the cups and a hell of a hill to climb.
They’ve added a few key pieces up front and down back, and are ready to battle it out. Bookmarkers believe in Micky Mellon, having them squarely midtable (13th), and so do I. A 16th placed-finish for Oldham.
Swindon Town
Swindon has the feeling of a club on the rise. Like many of the other teams in this league, they were searching for an identity last season. They may just have found one. Ian Holloway had been on a four year hiatus painting and traveling – including, of course, a portrait of Paolo Di Canio – before he was called back to service in October of last season. He was Manager of the Month in January, jumpstarted a team sitting in relegation with 13 points from his first six games, and just generally lit an absolute rocket under the seat of every player and supporter at The County Ground.
Holloway is a highly-accountable, empathetic firebrand. He walks the fine line between serious and not too serious (he asked his wife to cleanse the supposedly haunted training ground with sage); he got real with supporters (“If you don’t like me…don’t come”). He is providing this Swindon team with a kick in the pants and true leadership at a time of deep existential crisis. Follow me, I know the way – and if you don’t like it, you’re welcome to get off.
Outside of the manager’s position, Swindon ownership is genuinely engaged with their community, emphasizing a fan-first philosophy through things like co-ownership of the County Ground with the supporters’ trust. I mean, this is a club and town with true working class roots, and so there’s real promise in this blending of Holloway’s genuine enthusiasm and passion and ownership’s sensible, financially stable approach.
On the football side, they’ve converted a couple of key loans (Connor Ripley in goal, Tom Nichols up front) to full time. They’ve tried to trim the fat and focus on the core. But there’s still probably some moves to make.
Let’s not forget that Swindon is a team known for its peaks and valleys. Their 1920 – 2025 league performance chart reads like a penny stock ticker, a kind of static trend with many, many ups and downs. They experienced both trends last season. This season, all signs are pointing up. Bookmakers agree and have them fifth favorite to win the league – I’m even higher. Third place for The Robins in League Two this season.
Various Stages of a Hangover
Notts County
A segment where Oldham could easily find themselves in they don’t start fast, this is the section where we spotlight teams that might have some lingering feelings from the night before. For Oldham it would’ve been ecstasy, for Notts County, it’s agony, the agony of losing to AFC Wimbledon in the semi-finals, after a season with plenty of promise.
It kicked off some real soul searching and churn at Notts, specifically the sacking of Stuart Maynard due to “underwhelming performances,” according to the father/son club owners, and then the failure to secure Notts legend David McGoldrick to a new contract, despite his willingness to play for reduced terms. Fans are pissed about it, it will leave a void in the locker room for the new manager, Martin Paterson, a reasonably green appointment, to fill. It’s just generally kind of shitty allround, compounding the woes of losing in the playoffs.
To make matters worse, they’ve been slow to recruit given the late appointment of Paterson, and everyone from fans to owners to bookmakers are seeming impatient, expecting an immediate bounceback, raising the stakes on the new manager to deliver.
Everyone is quick to remind us that Notts County is the OLDEST football club in the world. But are they the wisest? Bookmakers have them 7th favorites to win the league, but I have them continuing to mire themselves in the muck of midtable with a 13th place finish.
Walsall
Alas, the Walsall hangover is potentially even worse, day four of a three day bender, with seemingly the only solution to drink your way out the other side. And while that might sound good at the time, it never works out, because eventually, the stomach lining can’t take it and the heartburn sets in, and then you do really need to slow down, put the old engine into neutral, and get back to some equilibrium.
And so the question for Walsall, who topped the table for over 100 days but collapsed late and lost in the playoff final to perennial uber-minnow AFC Wimbledon, is, can they have that recovery and reconciliation with their stomach and soul now, in the offseason? Or is this going to linger into the new year, much the same way the Luton hangover lingered and lingered until they ended up getting married in Vegas to an emotionally abusive husband you met because you accidentally spilt beer on him in a bar and didn’t want to upset him?
It all comes down to Mat Sadler. Sadler’s Saddlers. You couldn’t make that shit up. The first step in the right direction the board made was to keep Sadler after the end of season drama and lock him up through 2028. Rather than other clubs who might’ve panicked (*coughs NOTTS coughs*), Walsall took a deep breath, acknowledged the strong momentum that has been building in the club, and decided to stay the course.
That allowed the club to get a head start on recruiting, bringing in some fresh faces into the locker room, a squad that can now potentially build on their positives from last year rather than lingering on the failures. Sadler showed last season that he knew how to win pretty, with a high-press, wide attacking style, or win ugly in the grind.
They’ve also got ownership stability in the form of the Trivela Group, which also owns Drogheda United in Ireland, and has partnerships with clubs in Denmark (Silkeborg) and other European markets. Theoretically, that means better access to talent, better infrastructure, better continuity and financial stability.
Bookies like Walsall as an outsider with the 8th best odds to win the league, but I’m going to do it. I’m going to believe that there was something there in the first half of last season, and this squad can recover, reset, and go again. I’m picking Walsall to win it all and go up to League One next season.
Fleetwood Town
The final team in this section, and this hangover goes deep, all the way back to relegation from League One in 2024, to the financial dramas of Andy Pilley, to last season’s managerial overhaul going from Charlie Adam to Pete Wild mid-season.
They’ve seemingly shored things up somewhat with Wild continuing into this season, and Pilley’s ownership being passed to his son, Jamie, with strict oversight from the EFL along with an intention to go through an immediate sale process. So, the cleanup is underway, the electrolytes are starting to flow, the pounding headache is beginning to subside. But it is still early, and the club is clearly in recovery and reset phase.
It’s a shame because this is such a fascinating club. The “Cod Army,” an homage to Fleetwood’s deep-sea fishing heritage and no-nonsense, salty vibes. The club collapsed in 1997 and reformed, climbing from the North West Counties League (10th tier) all the way to League one in just over a decade. It mirrored a fight not just for football promotion, but for cultural relevancy amid the post-industrial decline of so many of the UK’s small single-industry towns. Fleetwood plays in the shadow of some bigger clubs like Blackpool, Blackburn and Preston, but that just drives their siege mentality and enriches the soul.
So it’s saltwater in the veins, diesel in the lungs, and a football product that drove a lot of immediate growth, but has struggled through the controversies of the past few years. Hopefully for them this will be a year of consolidation, staying up and putting together a platform from which to build. Bookmakers have them towards the back end of the league, but I have them finishing higher, mid-table, but still relevant in the playoff chase, in 12th.
Full Blown Teenage Identity Crisis
Goth or teeny-bopper? Anarchist or jock? Maybe both in the same week? This section highlights the clubs in desperate need of picking an identity and sticking to it.
Bristol Rovers
We start with the recently relegated Bristol Rovers. There’s turmoil in Bristol, on a number of fronts. Let’s start with the stadium. So for years, Bristol Rovers had a plan to move to a new 21,700 seat stadium in partnership with the University of the West of England. It would’ve been a modern complex with commercial add-ons, something to transform the finances of the team. But the deal fell apart in 2017, due to shifting priorities, and the Eastville site was eventually turned into an IKEA, which is kind of a shitty visual metaphor for a club’s ambitions.
Then, in late 2024, operational control of the club was taken over by Hussain Al-Saeed, a Kuwaiti businessman who has largely remained silent about his intentions and vision for the club. He told fans they were going to stay at their current stadium, but that’s pretty much it. Fast forward to the end of last season, and over 1,000 fans signed an open letter demanding clarity from Al-Saeed around the club’s strategy and growing disconnection between the community.
Woof. I mean, this is a club that’s really yo-yo’d between League One and League Two for most of the twentieth century, but even then this new iteration doesn’t feel good. In the locker room, Darrell Clarke is back (“I’m back.”) for his second stint at the club after a largely successful (and long) tenure in the 2010s. He believes in beautiful football, attacking football, not grinding and staying up, but playing and winning. He’s cleared out some of the locker room and made a few signings. Could he be the nostalgic bridge that fans desperately need in this time of uncertainty?
Bookmakers certainly think so: they have Rovers third favorite to win it all. I’m about the same range, a believer in Clarke and that this is still a squad with some talent. I’ve got them finishing fifth and battling it out for a promotion back to League One, which would be a welcome result for fans of the Gas.
Cambridge United
Is it possible to really be an outsider who is intrigued by the teams in these hoity-toity academic towns? The “book and ball” emblem, the heritage in the name – who can get behind that? And I’m a former academic myself!
But after digging deeper, I may be overlooking the true roots of the fanbase of this team. This is a hard-scrabbled, working class fanbase that is proud of the town’s cultural heritage but also seems to believe in a tough way of playing football.
Cambridge was relegated last season, and so is embarking on a classic Redemption Narrative, for all the English majors out there, a Hero’s Journey. Perhaps a Bildungsroman.
Whatever you want to call it, they have experienced a lack of true identity and follow-through over the past few seasons, echoed in Garry Monk’s brief tenure. They hired Neil Harris to bring stability to the group, but what does Neil Harris really provide? Is he grit or polish? Ya know?
What we do know is they haven’t done a hell of a lot to lift the roster in the offseason. They’re in desperate need of a striker. They’re missing much spark or creativity.
The question here seems to be, can they bounce right back; can they rebuild their soul and position for a bounce-back next year; or will they completely slip and end up towards the bottom of the table? All scenarios are plausible, but I have them sliding into mid-table, either in a true bottoming out, good long hard look in the mirror, or as a continuation of a slide…
A tough 18th finish for Cambridge United, and some soul searching.
Cheltenham Town
The Cheltenham story is a year ahead of Cambridge United – relegated last year, and kept the slide going, failing to bounce back and leaving fans disillusioned by a lack of goals and tactical drift.
I put a lot of it down to the club crest. It looks like it was designed by AI with the prompt “icon village bank in or about to be in administration.” Fucking awful.
The Robins have a history of hanging tough – they’ve flirted with relegation from the football league many times over the last 30 years and have somehow stayed up. It’s an identity built on grit and grind.
But there’s a big difference between grit and stodgy. One is a crunchy bowl of oatmeal topped with candied nuts and salty pecans, a dash of cream. A solid foundation from which to build your day. The other is a bowl of thick porridge you couldn’t feed to your dog as it is stuck to the side of the bowl. Both are theoretically breakfasts.
Chunky breakfast analogy aside, you get the picture. The club feels perhaps overly conservative and listless under the stewardship of Michael Flynn. Heavily focused on defense, a safe style of play – it’s a way to grind out draws, but lacks firepower. To pile on, the club has entered takeover talks with ex-Burnley chairman Mike Garlick, and has entered a period of exclusivity. Could be good for the club, could be bad, will undoubtedly distract and slow down resolution on the field.
Bookmakers don’t like their odds this year (21st overall), and neither do I. I have them finishing around the same spot, 20th in the league, narrowly avoiding relegation.
Crawley Town
Well, Scott Lindsey is back, like when your friend gets back with an ex after six months of everyone talking shit about them. There’s a story we can tell ourselves here that this was a classic “prodigal son returns” narrative, but let’s be real: this is a reunion of mutual convenience. Like a long-unhappy married couple who have decided to separate after the kids have left the nest, both parties have tasted what’s on the outside and decided, hey, maybe this wasn’t so bad after all.
Of this whole group of identity crises, Crawley Town feels perhaps closest to resolving it, based at least on their actions of the offseason. They lost a bunch of starters, including top scorer Rushian Hepburn-Murphy, but they replaced them with quality additions at low cost. They added Liverpool goalkeeper Harvey Davies on a loan. In Lindsey, they have someone who has a clear methodology and positive intent. He wants to play fast football, quick transitions, strong spine and defense. That’s the football that got them promoted in the first place.
And so while we haven’t seen them actually do it yet (therefore placing them into this category), I get the feeling they’re not far off. Bookmakers have them finishing midtable around 14th; I’ve got them even higher in the playoff race. Home cooking usually is superior to dining out; I’m backing Scott Lindsey and Crawley Town to bounce back and finish 6th.
Gillingham
My first exposure to Wild Thing was his massively unsuccessful fulltime stint at QPR, and I’ll tell you this about Gareth Ainsworth: even if his football sucks and his tactical nous is nout, his hair, is, wonderful. The flow is epic, just marvellous, you see it bouncing up and down on the sideline and it encapsulates you, makes you forget about what might be happening on the pitch.
Ainsworth will build a team that presses and stretches but concedes goals: the opposite of Gritty Gills football. Fans will become fed-up by Christmas and call for his head. THEN, Wild Thing will hear that call. He will genuinely, genuinely hear it. He’ll tinker with the squad. He’ll put his hair in a bun. He’ll do anything he can to tap into the pride of Priestfield, to get his squad up, playing for the fans who come there, for their dads, for the dads of their dads.
This is the optimistic reading of the Gareth Ainsworth narrative, and for Ainsworth this stop almost has to stick. And there’s a world where it does. There are many worlds where it doesn’t! But there are a couple where it does.
They’re rocking basically the same squad that led to their 17th placed finish last year, but there’s power in that hair. Gillingham is the only football club in Kent, and Gareth Ainsworth is the only manager who can deliver them to the promised land. Bookmakers agree with me – they’ve got them finishing 4th – I’m not quite there, but I have them just outside the playoff race with a new identity, renewed grit, and a very respectable 8th place in the league.
Newport County
In a compassionate world, something, or someone, would save Newport County. They’ve got the longest odds of any team to win the league – 200-1 – amongst narrowly missing relegation last year (22nd) and managerial churn, with local lad David Hughes hired in May to offer fresh leadership out of the muck – Hughes’ first managerial appointment in the football league.
Their identity is as an outsider. But they’re much, much more than that – they’re equal parts compassionate and cultural and interesting, and, of course, Welsh. With all the focus on Wrexham in recent years, a few more global fans could do worse than drawing their attention this way to see all the fascinating aspects that make up this club. Their 2025 kit partners with iconic Welsh band Skindred spotlights Newport’s Caribbean heritage (they look awesome, too). Their 2024 kit partnered with Athletic Bilbao to honor Newport’s role in sheltering Basque refugees during the Spanish Civil War in 1937. Marketing, sure, but nods to culture that you don’t see everywhere.
This is a club you want to succeed. The Exiles are, of course, known as The Exiles for their period of Exile, in 1989, when the club went out of business, were locked out of their ground, dropped from the football league and left for dead. But fans reformed them from the ashes, played in exile in Gloucestershire, then clawed their way back through the non-league wilderness before returning to the Football League in 2013. Epic stuff.
The signs, however, all point in the opposite direction. No meaningful signings in the offseason. A first-time manager. Massive emphasis on their academy graduates to provide meaningful input. There will be some tough nights on the banks of the River Usk this season.
I’ll be rooting for them, and so let’s put a bit of positivity into the world with our prediction: Newport County to stay up, and finish in 21st place, placing a building block for a better future.
Shrewsbury Town
The Shrews went down. Perhaps more importantly, Wild Thing left the building. In his stead stands Michael Appleton, the shortest-serving Blackpool manager in their history (11 games / 65 days – just two shy of his next appointment, Blackburn, where he lasted 67 days. Even crazier? He then went back for another stint – this time lasting a luxurious seven months!).
Is Michael Appleton the man to take this team to salvation? They’ve retained much of the relegated side from League One, which could be good, could be bad. A few reinforcements to the spine in defense and midfield. When are these guys going to go back to the original crest, by the way?! Fans at bringbacktheloggerheads.com are describing the new design as “a standalone piece of clip art with absolutely no relevance to our history.” Right on! I’m agreed that it looks like shite.
Of course, Shrewsbury itself is a historic town on the River Severn, a market town, birthplace of Charles Darwin. Fans are rarely flashy, with a mix of realism and hope that comes from a club that has spent the best part of a decade in League One.
So can the team hang in? Can it push for higher honors? How far can Appleton take them? Bookies don’t love their chances, putting them 18th in the pecking order. With a bunch of unknowns and a TERRIBLE crest, I’m right there with them – a 17th-placed finish in League Two this year for The Shrews.
Tranmere Rovers
What does this club really want to be? Are they a Merseyside yo-yo club? A mini-Wrexham? A League Two stalwart with tradition?
Anytime takeover rumors involve A$AP Rocky, you kind of know that things are going to get and stay interesting. And that’s the place the club has found itself in in recent times. The team struggled mightily last year until Andy Crosby took over in February and steadied the ship just enough to avoid relegation. They’ve made some key offseason signings, including Nathan Smith from Port Vale, who will most likely captain the squad and provide some much needed on-pitch leadership. From everything we know about Crosby so far, they’ll be a team focused on discipline and toughness, fighting hard to not just avoid relegation, but lay a groundwork for what’s to come.
There was hope here when Mickey Mellon was in charge, that Tranmere had really turned a corner and was returning to the promised land of League One and beyond. Remember, this is a club that was recently entrenched in the third division, and had been as high as second division football at the turn of the century. But then Covid hit, and they were relegated again, then went through about a thousand managers plus a brief Mellon reunion…just an absolute cluster.
You look objectively at the last five years and it is pretty difficult to paint a positive picture of club ownership. Erratic, looking for short term wins to drive value and possibly sell the club, no long-term vision of building a foundation and sticking it out.
I think it will be a tough season for Tranmere. Bookmakers have them 17th, I have them finishing 23rd and going down.
Apocalypse Now
Accrington Stanley
Apocalypse Now, at its core, is a battle for the soul. An existential crisis, a dark coming-of-age highlighting the darkness at the core of every individual, their efforts to meet it, confront it, beat it, and get out alive.
That same battle has played out for this football club over the past decade. Accrington Stanley is, on the surface, an absolute delight of a club, the heart and soul of Lancashire. They’ve got this quaint personality of the team from the milk ad in the 80s, the perennial underdogs, playing at tiny Wham Stadium with a tiny wage budget and limited commercial revenue.
And at the helm, they’ve had this plucky owner, Andy Holt, who has seemingly tried to do the right things, run a balanced budget, not overspend, build a foundation, build a personality, fight and fight and fight.
But one battle he has fought, and seemingly now lost, is with the council. Over the course of a decade-long feud, Holt has accused local authorities of sabotaging the club’s efforts to grow, by blocking planning permissions and stonewalling infrastructure upgrades. In April this year, this all finally came to a head, with Holt publicly threatening to walk away from the club, citing a personal vendetta against him and warning that the club’s long-term future was now in real jeopardy. For a team already surviving on thin margins, things like this can be the straw that breaks.
So do fans still have a reason to believe this season? The club is not just fighting to win games, they’re fighting to stay alive. And the uncertainty around Holt’s position and longevity in the role will do little to settle the team on the pitch, where manager John Doolan will attempt to continue the same high-wire balancing act he did last year, steering a team with very few resources to safety.
They’ll be in the relegation zone for sure, but like the club, the margins may be razor thin. As much as I’d like to believe, I agree with the bookmakers this time, and pick Accrington to finish 24th and be relegated to the National League.
Final Table Prediction: EFL League Two, 2025-2026 Season
- Walsall
- Chesterfield
- Swindon Town
- Salford City
- Bristol Rovers
- Crawley Town
- Bromley
- Gillingham
- Grimsby Town
- MK Dons
- Colchester United
- Fleetwood Town
- Notts County
- Barrow
- Crewe Alexandra
- Oldham Athletic
- Shrewsbury Town
- Cambridge United
- Harrogate Town
- Cheltenham Town
- Newport County
- Barnet
- Tranmere
- Accrington Stanley
Minnows Football 
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